i feel like a lot of the people i really like on here are deleting? kat deleted and good for her but i miss her a ton she was so nice and sure she got a bit heated sometimes but she’s a good person. and then ben p. deleted and i really liked him. he was a genuine guy. and my boyfriend barely uses tumblr ever and all the good friends i saw over break either don’t have tumblr at all or the ones that do barely go on at all.

everyone i know is having fun at college or going out and doing things and i’ve been using this website as some sort of like…crutch? that sounds dumb. but i keep going on here to waste time and i lie to myself and say i do it because i have friends here but let’s face it, i don’t. i just interact with some people from time to time who are all good friends with each other, and not me. and i’m not blaming any of you! you’ve known each other for a long time and i’m glad you’ve all made friendships through here and that’s great.

but i feel like this website is kind of…bad for me? i used to have great self confidence and sometimes i kind of do but most of the time i feel like i’m comparing myself to every pretty girl i see on here. and that’s no one’s fault but my own but i need to get my shit together.

i’ve been on tumblr for a little over 2 and a half years and it’s been fun but i think i should kind of quit, for the time being at least. i need to dedicate myself to my family, my boyfriend, my friends, and my school work. i need to stop judging people at my university and thinking i’m better than everyone because let’s face it, i’m not.

i am a smart and independent person, but i’m having some problems in my life right now. and that’s okay! i’ve been so harsh on myself lately and instead of fixing things, i’ve been avoiding them. that’s not healthy for me, or anyone really.

i need to work on me and this website has just been a distraction.

i won’t delete my blog because it’s basically a documentation of my teenage years, but i won’t go on for a while. i’m going to ask my boyfriend to change my password tomorrow when he wakes up so i won’t be able to log on.

i don’t know if i will ever come back, i probably will, but i need a break. a long one, possibly. it’ll be interesting to see how things are when i come back, however long from now that is.

anyway, i’ll still be on for an hour or so tonight, until i go to bed.

ALSO! i promised some of you bracelets and i’m working on them! i put all your addresses on a word document so i’ll be sending them out as i finish them.

AND ADDED NOTE: if i ever spoke to you on here or at least i kind of know you, feel free to add me on facebook or follow me on twitter! i barely tweet but oh well.

facebook: http://www.facebook.com/alisaalexandra

twitter: https://twitter.com/AlisaAlexandra

thanks to everyone who has been nice or kind to me, you’re seriously wonderful people.